My favorite movie when I was a kid was Poltergeist. I’m not sure if it was the fact that I resembled Carol Anne, the little girl that was pulled into the depths of hell (I suppose it was hell), or that I thought the idea of the supernatural would be fun—the 1st half of the movie showed the fun. Not the second half. Not the skeletons in the mud pit or the pulsing closet. I wasn’t scared by any of it, and I only averted my eyes when the man pulled the skin off his face and the maggots scrambled out of the piece of raw meat (that part was just gross).
And yet I do not like scary movies.
Khary and I made a bet years ago (the details of which I forget). The winner got to choose a movie. I lost. And then we made another bet. And another. Somehow an agreement was formed—one that stipulated that I would watch three scary movies a year with Khary.
I have not held up my end of the bargain.
I watched the movie Open Water, which Khary claimed was NOT a scary movie. But it secured the notion in my mind that I will never go scuba diving (not to mention I had a psychic tell me to never to go scuba diving. Although it may have had more to do with going with the pseudo-boyfriend I had at the time). I want to be able to see my feet in the water and know that nothing is going to mistake my toes for lunch.
Khary likes to watch cheesy movies on the Sci-Fi channel like DinoCroc or MutuantFish. He’ll turn them on saying, “I just want to see the Beastie.” The Beastie is always some badly animated beast that jerks and tweaks with old technology, but causes the hero and heroine scream in horror. And Khary laughs. I’ve gotten sucked in enough to wait for the Beastie, before going back to my crossword puzzle or nap. It’s never worth watching to the end.
The Beastie’s apparently don’t count towards our bet.
Halloween is this weekend, which means that there’s nothing Khary would like more than to watch a scary movie. If I had to (which I don’t), I’d give him the first Halloween. It’s got a creep factor to it, but then crosses the line to ridiculous when Jamie Lee Curtis insists on never turning on a light. But the new Exorcist or Paranormal Activity 2?
No. Thank. You.
I do think it would be funny if on Halloween there were a channel that went off-air. It would be like the Halloween Yule Log.
Photo courtesy of fullhalloween.com